"Falling for a wrong person isn't a mistake. But choosing to stick on for a lifetime is a crime, against yourself."
Was at a discussion forum a couple of months ago. The topic of discussion for that day was arranged marriage v/s love marriage. Obviously, the older citizens were arguing for arranged marriages and the youth differed from them. Then, this happened..
Uncle: "If you people say love marriages are safe, then why is that the divorce rates have gone high nowadays? It was never this high in our days when the majority were arranged marriages."
A friend: "That's because we atleast have the guts to walk out of unhappy marriages. And we are proud of it."
Very well said. Some conversation came up today, and reminded me of this. Relationships..Uff!!
p.s.- After reading the comments that followed, I'm changing the term 'unhappy marriages' in the line above to 'unhappy relationships'. Because that was what was actually on my mind when I put up this post. The quote from the debate was just to go with the thought . :)
Cheers,
Chandana C. Shekar
12 comments:
Well u see divorce rates have really gone up not only in love marriages but also in arrange marriages too. I agree with the point that this generation has the guts to walk out of a failed relationship, but at the same time both the parties are not ready to compromise on any issues..!!
YEah that is true butits not all about guts a lot of issues are invloved these days , people dont have patience.. dont want to adjust ... attitude problems .. and ITs in my thought stupidity to walk out if you can make it work and wont give it a shot ...
We have become too independant and expect the other to change according to our needs whereas we ourself dont want to ...
THe slap up thought above is queit right .. if you hav done all you an and still not working then offcourse its better to leave then make life miserable for the both..
and love marriages fail more cause its hunky dory when in love after marriage things change expectations change.. and so on and so forth
But it should not take long to find out if you are with a wrong person ... it shud not take 3 -4 years tofind that out ... you know you are witha wrong person very early :)
I fully agree with the above two.
still I think loving someone doesnt always mean we could spend all our life with that person.
(sometimes) when the distance vanishes we find ourself difficulty in adjusting with the same person for whom we'd dreamt every night and day.
well, i agree with both of u. but then, if ur not with the right person, its pathetic to stick on n adjust n adjust n adjust. adjusting is fine. but that shudn be to such an extent that it changes u!! there is somethin called 'good riddance' right??
actually when i put this quote up, i was thinkin of relationships. abt how to love someone and spend time n then get dumped n 'worry' abt it. or ur not happy with the way that person is treatin u n still u tend to stick on, coz u think that person is 'the love of ur life'. well, not everybody get to live with their loved ones. sometimes, its better to live with someone for whom u r the love of his/her life, then to stay with urs. u shall be happy then coz that person is gonna treat u right!!
i agree that the heart wants what the heart wants, but life cant go on with that!! cant be happy with that.!! ur life needs someone who treats u right.
I've seen older generation couples living together even though they are totally incompatible. they do so for the society n kids n what not. i dont think so thats good.
i agree, marriages need to be worked on. adjustments are to be made. quite a lot of it. both are to be given their own space. its not that im for divorces or somethin. just that, im for happiness.
and moreover, this post was abt unhappy 'relationships'. not marriages. :)
Good blogs, short and crisp. Good to read.
your post came just at the right time for me.
hope,I would be able to move along nicely now.
I am THANKING you this time. :)
i am presently trying to help a newly married couple with my best wishes as they r finding themselves not compatible..praying for the two good friends..
hmm nice one !! this post will defiantly inspire many to think over it !!
liked it !!
keep smiling :)
ya right:) good one le:) there is no point in continuing our life with whom we dont like:)
i dont quite beleive in tis at all ;)
@rama- thanks for bein here :)
@anurag- not a prob. hope u get thru it soon and well :) lifes indeed beautiful. we just need to get to that part :)
@ramesh- nice to have u here buddy :) hope ur friends end up well :)
@deepa- :)
@manju- yo :)
@anonymous- well, individual opinions :)
totally agree on this point... seeing so many elders unhappy in relationships but still carrying on and then mocking those who decide to divorce.. sometimes the best thing to do is call it quits rather than have 2 unhappy souls living together
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